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Courage to Change:

Many of us have had anxious moments at work and around our families when it came to making decisions affecting others as a group. We’d worry, “Will everyone be happy with the decision?” Surely there was one perfect way to do things, and it was our responsibility to find it.

Al-Anon has helped me to develop a simple policy about group decisions, as suggested by Al-Anon’s First Tradition: “Our common welfare should come first.” This Tradition applies to the conduct of our Al-Anon groups, but I find it useful in other situations, too. If the group’s plans seem designed to benefit the greatest number of people, I can usually support them. I don’t mean that I ignore my own needs and feelings—I express them. But others have needs too, and I must respect them. Such choices may not bring immediate happiness to me or to others, but ultimately we will all benefit. As the First Tradition says, “Personal progress for the greatest number de- pends upon unity.”

Today’s Reminder:

Do I try to force my will on others in group situations, or am I learning to respect their rights as well as my own? I can feel secure in my opinions if I keep the group’s best interest at heart.
“Unity presents not only the necessary climate for the growth of Al-Anon as a whole but also the atmosphere in which each member within the group may acquire peace of mind.” – The Twelve Steps and Traditions

From the book “Courage to Change”. Copyright Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 1992