Courage to Change:
I have often tried to change other people to suit my own desires. I knew what I needed, and if those needs weren’t met, the problem was with the other person. I was looking for someone who would always be there for me but would not impose on me very much. Looking back, it’s almost as if I were looking for a pet rather than a human being. Naturally, this outlook put a strain on my relationships. In Al-Anon I have learned there is a difference between what I expect and what I need. No one person can be all things to me.
Once again I’m faced with examining my own attitudes. What do I expect, and is that expectation realistic? Do I respect other people’s individuality — or only the parts that suit my fancy? Do I appreciate what I do receive?
Today’s Reminder:
Trying to change other people is futile, foolish, and certainly not loving. Today, instead of assuming that they are the problem, I can look at myself to see what needs changing within.
“The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves and not to twist them to fit our own image.” – Thomas Merton