Courage to Change:
There are times when everything the alcoholic in my life does irritates me. Sometimes he even seems to pour the breakfast cereal wrong! Although it’s important for me to learn to recognize and protect myself from unacceptable behavior, that’s not always what is going on. When I catch myself watching and criticizing every little detail of his behavior, I can use this as a signal that something is going on with me that l’ve missed or discounted. Am I afraid of an upcoming review at my job? Did something I heard at the meeting stir up unresolved anger from my past? Am I acting this way because of an old resentment I have chosen not to discuss? Making an Al-Anon phone call can help me to sort it out.
Today’s Reminder:
It can be almost as hard for me to give up criticizing as it is for the alcoholic to give up drinking — sometimes it seems so necessary! But though criticism and negative thinking can serve as a steam valve for my pain, they never solve my problems, only distract me from them. In the end, I only avoid getting to know myself.
“A man can detect a speck in another’s hair, but can’t see the flies on his own nose.”
– Mendele Mocher Seforim