Courage to Change:
I didn’t know how great a burden my guilt was until I made amends and gained release from it. I never wanted to face the harm I’d done in the past. Consequently, without knowing it, I carried guilt with me most of the time. Making amends has helped me to put the past behind me and move on with a clear conscience. My self-esteem has grown ever since, and I feel much better about myself.
But I had a problem. The person I felt I owed the most amends to is no longer living. Deep in my heart I knew she had understood and forgiven me, but I could not forgive myself for the harm I had done. How could I make amends?
After much prayer and thought, I realized that I couldn’t change the past. All I could do was to change my present behavior. Now, when I feel tempted to shirk a responsibility, I can remember my friend and reconsider my choice. Each time I talk to a newcomer, chair a meeting, or share my story, I am making amends to my friend.
Today’s Reminder:
I can’t make past wrongs disappear, but I can take actions that will help me to let them go. When I make amends, I do what I can to correct the situation. Then I can put the past in its rightful place and leave it there.
“Let me remember that the reason for making amends is to free my own mind of uneasiness.” – The Dilemma of the Alcoholic Marriage