Courage to Change:
One of my character defects is to respond in kind to behavior that is directed at me – to react to insults with more insults, to rudeness with rudeness. I never thought to act any other way until I began traveling to work with a long-time member of Al-Anon. Each day, when my friend would stop to buy the morning paper, the person behind the counter was surly and hostile. No matter how rudely she was treated, my friend consistently behaved with courtesy. I was outraged! Doesn’t Al-Anon tell us we don’t have to accept unacceptable behavior? Finally I asked her about it.
She told me that, since this is the only newsstand around, she would rather detach from the behavior than do without her morning paper. She explained that she is powerless over other people’s attitudes, but she doesn’t have to permit them to goad her into lowering her own standards for herself. To the best of her ability, she chooses to treat everyone she meets with courtesy. Other people are free to make whatever choices they prefer.
Today’s Reminder:
Today I will “Let It Begin with Me.” I do not have to accept unacceptable behavior; I can begin by refusing to accept it from myself. I can choose to behave courteously and with dignity.
My freedom and independence do not depend on any acts of defiance or confrontation. They depend on my own attitudes and feelings. If I am always reacting, then I am never free.