One Day at a Time in Al-Anon:
A man whose wife is an alcoholic often hesitates to seek help in Al-Anon because it seems like a confession of failure on his part. He may be reluctant to let go of the martyrdom of carrying the entire responsibility for the family; perhaps he derives an inner satisfaction from the dependency of the alcoholic, whom he considers weak and helpless.
In the Al-Anon program he can learn to make himself comfortable by not accepting his wife’s responsibilities. He will in time discover his own motivations and change his attitudes. And he will do nothing toward controlling his wife’s sickness, for the First Step assures him that he cannot.
Today’s Reminder:
When a man sees the logic and promise in the Al-Anon idea, he will accept the necessity of releasing his wife from his solicitous domination. He will realize that she will seek sobriety only when he allows her to face her problem. His search for help is thus not a confession of failure, but proof of his strength to reach out for a new life for his family.
“If that thou hast the gift of strength, then know thy part is to uplift the trodden low.”
— George Meredith, The Burden of Strength)