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One Day at a Time in Al-Anon:

It is difficult to overcome the habit of setting standards for our spouses, and expecting them to be followed. Unfortunately this may continue even after the alcoholic is sober in AA. We figure out what the results of his sobriety should be, in changed attitudes and behavior and, when things don’t work out the way we expect, we’re frustrated and angry.

I must teach myself to leave my partner to God and to his friends in AA. I must learn not to expect or demand. I will look for, and appreciate, his positive and desirable actions, and not concentrate on the negative. I must, in other words, do something constructive about my own attitude.

Today’s Reminder:

I will not look for perfection in another person until I have attained perfection myself. Since I know this will never be, let me learn to accept things as they are, and stop manipulating them into changing. Let me look for a wiser approach to life from myself, not from other people.

“Thou must learn to renounce thy own will in many things, if thou wilt keep peace and concord with others.”
— Thomas A’Kempis

From the book “One Day at a Time in Al-Anon”. © Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 1973