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One Day at a Time in Al-Anon:

We learn so much in Al-Anon, and in such interesting and unexpected ways. In the midst of a somewhat bantering interchange at a meeting, everyone suddenly laughed at something that was said. “Wait a minute,” one member interrupted. “Everyone around this table is smiling — we’ve all put aside our griefs and our grievances. Do we behave in this cheerful way at home, or do we automatically put on our martyr-face? I know I do – and right now I’m going to begin to change that.”

Today’s Reminder:

Do I habitually wear my martyr-face to remind my spouse what a hard time he’s giving me? Or do I try to lift his spirits — already so depressed by guilt and confusion? Will I try — really try — from now on, to be pleasant and a bit gay, even when things aren’t going my way? Am I afraid to let those around me know I do have some reasons to be happy, or do I want everybody to feel sorry for me?

“…that thou art happy, thou owest to God; that thou continuest such, thou owest to thyself.”
— John Milton, Paradise Lost

From the book “One Day at a Time in Al-Anon”. © Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 1973