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Courage to Change:

One of the first things I heard in Al-Anon was that we didn’t have to accept unacceptable behavior. This idea helped me to see that I need not tolerate violence or abuse, and that I had choices I hadn’t even recognized before. I set some limits, not to control others, but to offer myself guidelines so that I would know what was and was not acceptable and what to do about it.

A few years later I was congratulating myself on how I no longer had such problems, when I suddenly realized that there was still one person from whom I regularly accepted unacceptable behavior — me! I was continually berating myself and blaming myself when things went wrong. I never gave myself credit for my efforts. I told myself I was homely, thoughtless, lazy, stupid. I would never say those things to a friend. I realized that until I started treating myself like a valued friend, I would be standing in the way of my own recovery.

Today’s Reminder:

I have been affected by a disease of attitudes. When I treat myself with love and approval, I know that I am recovering.

“Let one therefore keep the mind pure, for what a man thinks, that he becomes.”
– The Upanishads

From the book “Courage to Change”. Copyright Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 1992