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Courage to Change:

A recent searching and fearless moral inventory of myself (Step Four) gave me a clear message: Much of my behavior was extremely immature. But what is mature behavior? Obviously the answer is different for each of us, but exploring the question can help me to identify my goals and apply the Al-Anon program as I seek to change this behavior. To me, maturity includes:

• Knowing myself.

• Asking for help when I need it and acting on my own when I don’t. Admitting when I’m wrong and making amends.

• Accepting love from others, even if I’m having a tough time loving myself.

• Recognizing that I always have choices, and taking responsibility for the ones I make.

• Seeing that life is a blessing.

• Having an opinion without insisting that others share it. Forgiving myself and others.

• Recognizing my shortcomings and my strengths. Having the courage to live one day at a time.

• Acknowledging that my needs are my responsibility. Caring for people without having to take care of them.

• Accepting that I’ll never be finished — I’ll always be a work-in-progress.

From the book “Courage to Change”. Copyright Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 1992