Courage to Change:
During the entire process of working on my Fourth Step (making a searching and fearless moral inventory of myself), I felt a nagging suspicion that I wasn’t doing it right. With my Higher Power’s help, I finally realized that the problem wasn’t that I had done my Fourth Step wrong; the fact was that I had the same sense of inadequacy about my whole life. Whatever I’m doing, I’m inclined to feel that I’m doing it wrong, that my best is not good enough. And that is simply not true. I am doing just fine.
The awareness that I have developed through Step Four puts my self-doubt into perspective. It’s just an effect of years of living with problem drinkers. So when the feeling comes up, I recognize it, share about it, accept that I feel it, and then set it aside. I no longer assume that it has any validity.
Today’s Reminder:
Step Four offers me a chance to find some balance. It helps me to identify the things I’ve been telling myself about myself, and to learn whether or not those things are true. Today I will take one of my assumptions about myself and hold it up to the light. I may find that it stems from habit rather than reality.
“Let me realize… that self-doubt and self-hate are defects of character that hinder my growth.” – The Dilemma of the Alcoholic Marriage