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Courage to Change:

I like people, and at one time I wanted everyone to be my friend. With the best of intentions, I tried to encourage friendships with certain individuals, although my attempts were repeatedly, discreetly rebuffed.

I was comforted by the words I heard at the close of each Al-Anon meeting: “…though you may not like all of us, you’ll love us in a very special way — the same way we already love you.” It was an important lesson that, while I can’t have everyone’s friendship, I can offer and receive respect, support, and understanding. Patience and humility soothed my wounded pride.

Today’s Reminder:

It is unrealistic to expect everyone to like me. With such an expectation, I set myself up to fail and give myself an excuse to blame that failure on others. I can’t change other people, but I can change my own attitudes. I can let go of my rules about how others should feel about me. When I am disappointed in another’s response, I can make an extra effort to be kind, warm, and loving to myself. I am lovable just the way I am.

“To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.”
– Oscar Wilde

From the book “Courage to Change”. Copyright Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 1992